Noah D'Angelo

Ethan McGee can’t vote in the next election, but he likes Trump and his plans, despite the massive comb-over.

How Trump does his hair

We all know Presidential running candidate and multi-millionaire Donald Trump. His hair is phenomenal, probably more famous than he himself. What does he do in the morning to maintain such beautiful locks?

Let’s look into a morning with Trump… and his hair.

Step 1: Wake up

Step 2: Preheat oven to 450 degrees Fahrenheit

Step 3: Get in shower

Step 4: Wash body and hair

Step 5: Dry off and blow dry hair with standard blow dryer

Step 6: Hear oven beep

Step 7: Order un-documented domestic to put very expensive quiche into oven

Step 8: Go back upstairs and unplug blow dryer

Step 9: Read 2 pages from Mein Kampf

Step 10: Turn fan on high

Step 11: Step in front of fan to finish drying hair

Step 12: Comb hair with $50 brush made in China

Step 13: Go downstairs and eat quiche

Step 14: Go to work and draw sketches of The Great Wall of ‘Merica

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