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FROM THE BLUEPRINT SATIRE DEPARTMENT

The best night of the school year for every student is prom. This night filled with dancing, hanging with friends, and good times has tragically been cancelled for all Bellwood-Antis School students. The reasoning came as a shock to the whole student body.

The school had accumulated it’s 10th phone violation in the month of March, which gave the administration the power and ability to cancel the big night.

“This school needs to learn to stay off those electronics. Back in my day those stupid gizmos didn’t even exist!” exclaimed an anonymous administration member.

Some students are outraged to hear the cancellation news, while others don’t seem to be affected.

“I could care less if we have prom. I’d pretty much have to take out a personal bank loan to afford a ticket,” said senior Jake Martin.

Since prom has been cancelled, students have been looking for an alternative way to spend the evening of April 29th. The school has announced that students will instead be attending a pep rally for the football team.

“Football is way more important than prom. Here in Bellwood, football is life and football IS Bellwood,” exclaimed another anonymous member of administration.

Local authorities have also been alerted of an underground prom being organized by the angry students and they are currently heavily investigating the issue. Most teachers seem to be in support of the cancellation, except for Industrial Arts teacher and Lunch Monitoring Specialist Mr. Crowell.

“Prom was bomb-diggity back in my day. I used to boogie all night, these students deserve the night of prom.”

The students stand with Mr. Crowell and thank him for his support. Stay tuned to the Blueprint for any updates on this developing story and be ready for more cancelled events and gatherings.