Sewage backup in Bellwood reveals huge surprise

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Yesterday, Bellwood-Antis high school and middle school students were sent home due to a sewage backup in the school.  What caused this backup? No one seemed to have a clue.  Until this morning.

Yesterday police came to investigate the sewage problem to see if any student or staff member may have been responsible.  After a few hours of investigation police seemed to have found the answer— millions of ballots had been dumped into the toilets in the downstairs boys bathroom.  That’s not all however, every single ballot pulled out of the pipes had the same name on them— Jo Jorgensen.  

A police officer who will remain nameless commented on the situation, “So far it is estimated that we’ve pulled 75 million ballots out of various pipes around the school, all of which were bubbled in for Jo Jorgensen.”

This raises the question, if these ballots were real did Jo Jorgensen possibly win this election?  

Many libertarians are outraged to find out that so many ballots were thrown away.  Jerry Patterson, a local libertarian expressed his anger to Blueprint reporters. This election was a disgrace.  The people that did this need to be put in jail for life.”  

This situation put the government into a frenzy as officials are trying to figure out if the ballots are actually valid.  Speaker of the house, Nancy Pelosi has stated that, “If the ballots are actually valid, then this may just mean that Jo Jorgensen will be our next President of the United States.”

This election certainly has no shortage of twists and turns.  Between Trump challenging the legitimacy of the election and Jo Jorgensen’s lost ballots, America is in for a real showdown in the next coming weeks or even months.